Navigating grief and emotional trauma is one of the most difficult challenges a person can face. During times of profound loss, many people struggle in silence and neglect their own mental well-being. The concept of a regular emotional “self-check” is crucial for survival, yet it often gets pushed aside in the rush of daily life. Recognizing the need to pause, reflect, and seek support is the first vital step toward genuine healing.
Reverend Iesha Congo Watson understands this journey deeply. As an ordained minister, motivational speaker, and the author of A Walk Through the Valley, she has transformed her own tragic losses into a mission of hope. Through her writing and her leadership of Beauty for Ashes Ministries Inc. and the Jaden Earl Foundation, she provides actionable resources for those walking through their darkest moments. In honor of Self-Check Month,, we sat down with Iesha to discuss her personal story, the importance of emotional wellness, and how to find purpose after pain.
Q: The recent press release highlights the importance of Self-Check Month. Why is the concept of a routine emotional “self-check” so vital for those dealing with trauma?
Iesha Congo Watson: For those dealing with trauma, a routine emotional “self-check” is vital because trauma can affect how we respond emotionally, mentally, and even physically, sometimes before we consciously recognize what is happening.
A self-check creates an intentional moment to ask, “How am I really doing?” , Am I okay ? It gives us an opportunity to identify emotions, recognize triggers, notice changes in sleep, energy, stress, or behavior, and determine what kind of support or care we may need.
For someone who has experienced trauma, it can be easy to operate in survival mode and simply keep going. They encourage self-awareness and allow us to respond to what we are feeling rather than continually suppressing or ignoring it.
Most importantly, self-checking isn’t about diagnosing yourself or expecting yourself to handle everything alone. It’s about becoming aware enough to recognize when you need rest, healthier boundaries, coping strategies, connection, or professional support. Checking in with yourself is an important part of caring for yourself.
Q: A Walk Through the Valley chronicles your deeply personal journey through grief after the tragic loss of your children. How did you find the strength to turn such profound pain into a mission to help others?
Iesha Congo Watson: Finding the strength to turn my pain into purpose wasn’t something that happened overnight. Grief changed me in ways I could never have imagined, and there were moments when simply making it through the day required strength I didn’t know I had.
My faith became an anchor for me. I had to learn that healing didn’t mean forgetting my child or moving past the love I have for my child .It meant learning how to carry that love, and even the pain in a way that allowed me to keep living, growing, and serving.
Over time, I realized that my journey wasn’t only about what I had lost. It was also about what I could do with what I had survived. I began to see that there were other people walking through their own valleys who needed to know they weren’t alone. That realization gave deeper meaning to my work and became part of my mission.
A Walk Through the Valley represents that journey. It is about acknowledging the reality of grief while also making room for faith, healing, hope, and purpose. I don’t believe we have to choose between grieving and growing, we can do both at the same time.
Today, when I share my story or support someone through their own difficult season, I carry my children with me. Their lives and their love continue to inspire me to help others find hope, even in the valley.
Q: You often emphasize the idea of exchanging the pains of life for spiritual promises. What is the most critical lesson you want readers to take away from your book?
Iesha Congo Watson: The most critical lesson I want readers to take away is that pain does not have to have the final word. We may not get to choose the valleys we walk through, but we can choose what we hold on to while we are there.
For me, exchanging the pains of life for God’s promises doesn’t mean pretending the pain isn’t real. It means acknowledging the hurt while choosing to believe that God is still present, still faithful, and still able to bring healing, hope, and purpose out of what we’ve experienced.
Q: In addition to your writing, you founded Beauty for Ashes Ministries Inc. and the Jaden Earl Foundation. How do these organizations actively support individuals facing grief and mental health crises?
Iesha Congo Watson: Beauty for Ashes Ministries Inc. and the Jaden Earl Foundation were both born from deeply personal experiences and a desire to help others navigate grief, emotional wellness, and difficult seasons of life.
While the Jaden Earl Foundation no longer operates as a separate organization, the heart behind its work mental health awareness, suicide prevention, and encouraging people not to suffer in silence, continues to be an important part of the outreach and advocacy work I do.
Through Beauty for Ashes, we provide education, encouragement, workshops, community outreach, supportive resources, and partnerships that address grief, self-care, emotional wellness, and overall well-being. We want to create spaces where people feel seen, supported, and empowered to seek the help they need.
Our role is not to replace professional mental health treatment or crisis services, but to help bridge the gap through awareness, education, faith, community support, and connection to appropriate resources.
Ultimately, the mission is about reminding people that there is hope beyond their pain. What began through my own experiences with grief and loss has grown into a commitment to helping others heal, find their strength, and know they do not have to walk through difficult seasons alone.
Q: You also created the affirmation journal A Dose a Day. How does the simple act of daily journaling contribute to long-term emotional recovery?
Iesha Congo Watson: Daily journaling can be a powerful part of long-term emotional recovery because it creates space for us to intentionally check in with ourselves. That was the heart behind A Dose a Day—encouraging people to pause, reflect, and speak words of affirmation, hope, and strength over their lives each day.
I believe healing often happens through small, consistent choices. Journaling allows us to acknowledge our emotions, recognize patterns, celebrate progress, and eventually look back and see growth that we may not have noticed while we were going through it.
Self-Care Isn’t Selfish is another publication that reflects this message. Self-care is not selfish. It is a necessary part of healing, restoration, and emotional well-being. Taking time to rest, reflect, set healthy boundaries, pray, and care for your needs does not mean you are neglecting others. It means you are honoring the life, mind, body, and spirit God has entrusted to you. You cannot pour from an empty place, and caring for yourself creates space to show up with greater strength, clarity, and compassion.
That is the heart behind the Self-Care Isn’t Selfish Workbook. It is designed to help you slow down, recognize what you need, practice intentional self-care, and release the guilt that can come with prioritizing your well-being. Self-care is not about being self-centered; it is about becoming more aware, balanced, and whole.
I’ve also recently released 4 Strategies for Healing, a devotional designed to take that journey a step further by bringing faith into the healing process. It provides encouragement, spiritual reflection, and practical strategies to help people become more intentional about their healing while trusting God through the process.
These resources reflect something I strongly believe: healing is not about ignoring what happened or pretending the pain no longer exists. It is about learning how to move forward with intention, faith, hope, and healthy self-care. Sometimes that begins with something as simple as taking a few minutes each day to reflect, write, pray, rest, and remind yourself that your healing matters.
Q: For someone who feels completely overwhelmed and is currently walking through their own “valley,” what practical first step would you suggest they take toward healing?
Iesha Congo Watson: The first step I would suggest is simply to acknowledge where you are. You don’t have to have everything figured out, and you don’t have to rush yourself through the valley. Sometimes healing begins with being able to say, “This hurts, I’m overwhelmed, and I need support.”
From there, take one small, intentional step. That may mean talking with someone you trust, journaling what you’re feeling, praying, allowing yourself to rest, joining a support group, or reaching out to a counselor or mental health professional. Healing doesn’t require you to do everything at once.
I also encourage people to ask themselves, “What do I need today?” Not next month or even next week but today. When you’re overwhelmed, focusing on one day and one need at a time can make the journey feel more manageable.
Most importantly, don’t isolate yourself in the valley. Give yourself permission to receive support. There is strength in recognizing when you need someone to walk alongside you.
The valley may be part of your story, but it does not have to be the end of your story. Take the first step, however small it may seem, and allow healing to unfold one day at a time.
Grief is a deeply personal experience, but no one has to navigate it alone. Iesha Congo Watson proves that resilience is possible even in the aftermath of unimaginable heartbreak. By sharing her own story and building supportive communities, she offers a clear roadmap for anyone struggling to find light in the darkness.
As the conversation around mental health and self-care grows, the need for compassionate, lived-experience resources becomes even more critical. Tools like A Walk Through the Valley and dedicated support networks are essential for guiding individuals through the healing process. Embracing vulnerability and seeking help remain the most powerful ways to transform tragedy into lasting purpose.
To learn more visit https://ieshacongowatson.com/
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